(Re-post from last August – formerly titled “Ilwaco, Washington”)
.
And so I have gone down
to the salty, briny air
where the surf tumbles the sand
and the wind combs through my hair,
where the seagulls dip and squabble
and the pocket pools grow warm
and the starfish nuzzle rocks
as the tide begins to turn,
where the sun lights through each wave
as it surrenders to the sea
and the sky steams into purple
and the night spits stars to me.
.
(c) 1992, 2012 Betty Hayes Albright
Oh wow, Betty–I’m sure I must have loved it the first time, and now I love it even more! It’s all great, but I especially like from where “the tide begins to turn” on down to the “sky steams into purple and the night spits stars to me”. Wow.
Thanks again, Caddo! I think you were the only one who read this previously. Glad you liked it again!
A true work of art Betty.
Anna
]
Thanks very much, Anna!
A wonderful use of language, Betty.
Thank you, Ben – nature always inspires “language”, doesn’t it!
To talented folks folk as you, Betty.
Great poem, great writing! I love the line “and the night spit stars to me” – wordplay like that is a gift
Thank you – nice of you to say so!
These lines embody the pure rhythms of sea, surf and wind over sand and waterfowl, Betty! Perfect match of form and content!
Thank you, Granbee – for your always lovely comments!
The sea is the muse to so many poets…a fine verse here.
Thanks, Charlie!
…and the night spits stars to me
I love it
Thank you, Ina! I’m glad you enjoy this sea poem.
Star fish nuzzle the rocks…and the sky spits stars and steams into purple…wow, lovely images, Betty.
Thank you, Anna.
fantastic use of language, image and , well Talent!!!!! Loved it, Linda
Linda, thank you!
The craft of this poem is important to notice, Betty. First, it’s written in a single sentence with lots of dependent phrases, giving it a breathless feeling. You also keep repeating phrase structures:
as the tide begins to turn…
as it surrenders to the sea…
The use of the connector and over and over again also works.
Using language like this builds tension and it becomes more and more daring until, finally, the last line comes,
and the night spits stars to me.
and there is a heavenly climax mixed with an earthy word that makes the poem absolutely sing.
Thomas, I’m so glad the poem “sings” for you. I worry about using “and” and “as” (and other connectors) so often in one poem, but that’s just how they flow into my head sometimes. Thank you – I’m pleased you think this works all right!
I am so glad you reposted this, Betty! I agree with Thomas Davis about its breathlessness … and that it sings … two things which are not as opposing as they seem. Indeed, you took me ‘to the sea’ with this poem, with each descriptive word and phrase so exactly chosen and blended and therefore flowing. The last line is wonderful–such a unique way of describing a starlit night.
Diane, thank you so much! I’m gratified that you too liked the “breathlessness” of the poem.
“where the surf tumbles the sand and the wind combs through my hair,” love these lines, so soothing and tangible, Betty, but the entire poem is beautiful~